My name is Lauryn P. and I am twenty-two years old. I was born and raised in Cleveland, Ohio. I have been struggling with drug addiction and alcoholism for seven years now. Here is just a little bit about my background.
I was blessed enough to be raised in a very loving Catholic family. My parents provided me with everything I could have ever needed and wanted. As a young child I was very rebellious and acted out. In grade school I was bullied and made fun of every day, and never felt apart of anything. I would have done anything to just fit in. Middle school is when the drinking and smoking weed started and once again it was all so that I could fit in. After I had started that, I always felt a part of, like I had finally found my calling. Shortly after that is when the legal issues, suspensions from school, the anger and fighting, sneaking out of my house, and never listening to my parents came into play; which was all directly related to my drinking and drug use. During high school is when all the other substances came into play; high school was one big blur for me. I barely graduated.
Working at a restaurant I met this guy who I really fell for, he was the one who introduced me to heroin. He shot me up the first time that I used, and that is when my life began to crumble into a million pieces. Not only did I find something that made me not feel, it also made me not care about a single thing and I loved it. Over the next seven years I have been to countless rehabs, detoxes, and IOP’s, stolen from my family and friends, been homeless, eaten out of dumpsters, panhandled, prostituted, overdosed, you name it I’ve done it. Still none of those consequences were able to keep me clean. When I arrived in Florida in 2011 for my first rehab down here, I figured I would give this recovery thing a try. I went to a halfway house, got a sponsor, was working my steps, and actively going to meetings, and helping others; I got a job in treatment, got my car, got my own apartment, and most importantly was genuinely happy. Until the night my disease convinced me that I could drink successfully. One beer lead to a case, and then a bottle, and three days later I was back to my drug of choice.
Within four months I lost my job, apartment, friends, family, and was living on the streets doing the same things that I was doing previously that I had done to get high. I walked into Angels Recovery on March 24, 2014 broken, angry, and hurt. I was done and I knew there was a better way to live.
I took every suggestion that was given to me, I came to a halfway house in a different town, I got a home group, a sponsor, I do service work, go to meetings, and now am doing everything that I need to in order to not go back to that way of life. I have a little over three months and I no longer want to die, I finally am able to see light at the end of the tunnel. Each and every day that goes by it gets better and better. My family is back in my life, I have a full time job, and once again I am genuinely happy. People, places, and things that cannot help further me in my recovery do not need to be a part of my life today. I am so grateful that my higher power gave me another chance in life. I now believe that I deserve nothing but the best, and I cannot wait to continue on this journey, and cannot wait to see what God has in store for me.